The best way to become more self-confident is to invest in yourself and become the best at what you do. As you improve your expertise and put it to work towards your objectives, you solve problems, and you start seeing results. This automatically results in more self-confidence. This is the quickest way to success and to happiness.
You can also, as many advise you to do, tell yourself that you believe in yourself, and you love yourself and all that self-affirmation bla bla and you will never reach real confidence. Don’t get me wrong, self-affirmation is an important step to self-confidence but it cannot do miracles. If you don’t put in the hard work to become the best at what you love, you will never get shit done, and you will never reach the level of confidence you need to win at the game of life.
Thomas Carlyle said, “Nothing builds self-esteem and self-confidence like accomplishment”. In other words, build your expertise, take risks, problem solve, and accomplishment will come. To do this, you have to kill all the noise around you, don’t try pleasing everyone and partner up with like-minded people that complement your skill set and make you tough to break.
Emotional intelligence is the best investment. One of the steps I recommend to entrepreneurs is to become more emotionally intelligent. Research shows that the more emotionally intelligent we get the happier we are and the more successful we become. Without good relationships, we become irrelevant or even die. And if you want good relationships, you need emotional intelligence which means learning about other’s emotional needs and how to deal with them. The second piece of the emotional intelligence equation is self-awareness. You can practice self-awareness by paying attention to the way you think, feel, and behave in specific circumstances. Take notes to better understand how you react to external events and to stressful emotions. Take note of what you do effectively. This will help you get to know yourself. Practice meditation.
Crisis management and problem solving: As we enter yet another economic crisis, those that understand risk are normally better at avoiding shocks as they are less decision-reactive when a bad event happens. They wait for the dust to settle and then strike. They integrate risk management into their decisions and often are able to convert crises into opportunities. Problem solving is what this is all about, and the person that is better at problem-solving will win.
When you put in work you will start seeing the results, more mental focus, more money, or whatever you’re after, you start believing in your ability to get stuff done. Don’t wait any longer, get out there, do more every day, get better at what you do, see results, problem solve, build a team, repeat that process and grow more confident.