Walk into any Italian café or bar and you’ll see it happening. The barista remembers your name and your usual order after one day at their places. The shop owner asks about your family. The customer at the next table strikes up a conversation that somehow feels like you’ve known each other for years.
In Italy, this isn’t just good service or small talk, it’s how shit runs. Relationships and people come first, always. Whether in business or friendship, Italians instinctively understand that genuine human connection is the foundation of trust, loyalty, and even success.
Unlike the fast-paced, transactional networking common in many cultures, Italians play the long relationship game. Deals are made over dinners, not cold conference calls or zooms meeting. Real partnerships are sealed with warmth and familiarity, not just contracts and pitch decks. And once you’re in the circle of trust, you’re there for the long run.
The Italian Way: Relationships Before Business
In Italy, business and pleasure are rarely separate. It’s common for business associates to become lifelong partners. and friends to become business partners. This relationship-first approach means that trust, loyalty, and emotional connection carry far more weight than credentials or pay checks.
You’ll often hear Italians use the phrase “ci conosciamo” (we know each other) as a stamp of approval. It signals more than familiarity, it reflects a bond that carries influence and opens doors. People will often also say “oggi offro io” (today I treat) as Italian like to buy a round of drinks for their friends and acquaintances.
Example:
If you’re dealing with an Italian supplier, don’t be surprised if they invite you for dinner or introduce you to their family before discussing pricing. It’s how they get to know you and how they build trust. It can be time consuming and frustrating at times, but it is a way to build long term trust.
Books That Capture the Italian Art of Connection
If you want to adopt the Italian mindset toward relationship-building, these books offer powerful insights:
Never Eat Alone by Keith Ferrazzi
This book is a must read and it captures the importance of building genuine relationships. Ferrazzi’s Italian-American background showcases the generosity, authenticity, and emotional connection over transactional based networking.
- Key takeaway: Successful people are kind and solve other people problems.
La Bella Figura: A Field Guide to the Italian Mind by Beppe Severgnini
Severgnini breaks down the nuances of Italian culture, including how Italians naturally build relationships through charm, seductiveness, and friendship
- Key takeaway: Italians make connections by pleasing people, not by showing off.
The Art of the Deal… Italian Style by Anthony Parinello
Parinello describes how Italians approach business with an objective of relationship-first. The book shows how charisma, emotional intelligence, and meaningful connection create stronger, longer-lasting partnerships.
- Key takeaway: In Italy, it’s not just who you know, it’s how well you know them.
Case Studies: When Relationships Drive Results
Ferrero Chocolate: Family Values and Loyalty in Business
The Ferrero company, famous for Nutella and Ferrero Rocher, is a perfect example of how relationship-driven corporate culture led to global market leadership and success. Then company founder, Pietro Ferrero built the company by forming personal, trust-based relationships with local farmers, artisans and suppliers. These trust-built relations created loyalty and sustainable practices which have been instrumental in converting Ferrero into a global leader, without losing its family-driven culture.
Even today, Ferrero puts its partnership with the supplier first, maintaining a strong community corporate culture, where employees feel part of a family rather than just a workforce.
The Italian Wine Industry: Business Through Bonds
In regions like Tuscany, Veneto and Piedmont, winemakers understand that selling wine is as much about connection as it is about quality and consistency. Many family-run wineries rely on personal relationships with distributors and clients rather than marketing and trade shows appearances.
Visitors are invited for private vineyard tours, home-cooked meals, and intimate tastings. By the time they leave, they feel like part of the community and because of that personal connection that is created, Â those visitors become loyal ambassadors for life.
What You Can Learn from Italians
- Take your time. Don’t rush into business relationships, get to know your interlocutor first.
- Be generous. Share your time, advice, and connections without expecting immediate returns. When you are helping others, you are developing lasting relations.
- Mix personal and professional. Allow people to get to know you, to know your interests, values, and passions.
- Create lasting relations. In Italy, the best business partnerships feel more like friendships.
Build Your Network, Italian Style
If you want to create a network that adds value to your life, learn from the Italian lifestyle. Slow down, spend time with people, and build relationships that go beyond business. Because in the end, your net worth will always be measured by the people you can count on.